1. The Weather
Thanks to Russia, temperatures are going to plummet to -11 in scenes not witnessed since last winter. I do not know what everyone is complaining about, as everyone knows there is no place on earth as cold as a British bathroom in early Spring*, so they should be used to it by now.
The following photographs are likely to appear in the next few days:
- Child tobogganing in inadequate outerwear down Richmond Hill
- Dog with snow on nose
- Man with beard looking at frozen water feature/waterfall in a mournful style
- People skating on a puddle
- Malnourished snowman (due to deficit of actual snow with which to build anything of any substance)
- Picture of the only snowplough in England broken down somewhere off the M4.
Sex dreams about Mark Rylance.
Wolf Hall (Review 2)
Polar Bears. Mammoth, adequate snow wear, shagging in a garage. Everyone's a bit confused but think they have to enjoy it because it's set up north. I think you 'need fortitude' to be able to sit through it !!!!!!
* This was said by some fella in a newspaper last week but I can't remember who - Times I think, writing about Fortitude