I have been taken off a blogroll! It is almost certainly not the first time, and yet suddenly I am curious; I am alarmed; I am (dare I say it?): Taking Myself Seriously.
I thought you were supposed to do the Hot Internet Web Log Action for fun! If the prevailing winds were favourable and delivered self-haircutting pathologists, new chums or book deals, then so much the better. (One and two: yes; fingers crossed for three!) But no! This is a Serious Business, and I am A Serious Blogger. I know this, because I write an email asking why I have been taken off a blogroll!
An immediate (and accurate) observation would be that I am in fact a knobber. But I like to think that it is a little more complex than that; that by suddenly taking myself seriously, I have Grown Up. I have Failed as a normal, cheerful sort of person with a web log who counts herself lucky to have met Canadians with American Hair and made new chums. Instead, I Am A Serious Blogger. I shall, from this moment on, care about my web stats, blogrolls, whether or not I have a publishing deal*, and what people think of me.
Simply put, that means that there is no more room for this kind of nonsense:
Meanwhile my brother, Runningmonkey (three years younger than me, despite looking older than me: a fact often remarked upon by literally everyone we know), is watching a film with Danny de Vito in it. His incisive criticism so far has included the ground-breaking observation: "Fuck me, he's really SHORT, isn't he? I had no idea he was so short! He's not even four foot tall!".
* I'd still like one though, with a picture of a monkey on the front and an advance of £10,000.
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21 comments:
Ms Monkey, if it consoles you in any way I recently added you to my blogroll because you have a very fine blog. I'm afraid I can't help with the publishing deal though.
Well, I added you to my blogroll yesterday, but don’t expect much, when I checked my “out clicks”, I found that there was a sad lack of clicking activity going on.
blogroll, schmogroll - that dancing! I'm getting monkeyfather out of bed NOW so that we can start practising. Too bad he never played cricked, otherwise he'd have the outfit in the cupboard.
See, that's the kind of dancing they SHOULD have taught my in dance school. I never would have left!
(And I too have recently added you to my blogroll, but don't expect a sudden traffic boom from me, given around 50% of my hits are probably from myself.)
Non-working monkey! I THINK you're on my blogroll too, if a blogroll is what I now think it is. I first suspected it was something highly technical and impossible for the likes of me, but now I think you may indeed be on my blogroll if it means the linky things down the side of ones blog. Hurray! You must be only thrilled to bits.
You wrote an email asking why you'd been taken off?
Did you get a reply?
My strategy for dealing with such things is sitting in a darkened room, sobbing gently.
Although I noticed recently that I'd been put back on a blogroll and I was childishly delighted.
Oh aren't they lovely movers! Must be all that Omega 3 in the herring oiling the joints. Bet they never break their hips. I'm quarter Danish, but sadly the lovely mover gene failed to come my way, if that's the right turn of phrase.
I'm sure the blogroll omission is just a wee oversight. I'll engrave you on an Arctic Roll if you like? Now wouldn't that be cool!
I've had you on two blog-rolls. I even had your last website blog-rolled before this one began. Who is the fool that dropped you from their recommended list?? Did you reject their monkey?
Lola x
I'm afraid you are suffering from an onset of Late Youth, which means you take yourself seriously. However, it gets better when you reach the age of Mid-Life Crisis, when you will wear ever more frivolous undergarments and take nothing, especially blogging, seriously at all.
I do not have a blogroll as I would not want to risk hurting anyone's feelings by ever removing them, so it would end up longer than my blog.
Serious webloggers don't have weblog rolls.
Holy Sacro-Iliac !!! Watching that finn boogie on down is on my list of the top 10 funniest things ever, especially that bit in the end when he gets competitive and really let the hips slide. Must have been some Hot nights in Helsinki !
PS. You can roll in my bog anytime, dear monkey.
Don't change! I'm even blogrolling you to convince you that this was no great loss (except to the person who removed your link).
ha ha ha ha ha ...
xxxx
Ooh, Finnish disco dancing! You've not lived until you've seen a couple of hundred dressed-to-the-nines Finns dancing to a cover band version of "Ra-Ra-Rasputin" on the night ferry from Helsinki to Stockholm. Dinner-dance culture very much alive and well over there.
The first de-blogrolling always cuts the deepest. It gets progressively easier after that. 99% of the time, it's just because the blogroller has decided that, although it's been lovely listening to you, there are some equally lovely people on the other side of the room which they simply must meet, and would you mind awfully if they mingled?
Dearest Everyone, for you are all Dear,
Now then, now then. First up, thank you for the blogrolling.
Second up, I wish - oh how I wish - I could explain how much I didn't mind. I was curious, yes, but I didn't mind.
Third up, it turns out that the poor person to whom I sent the email (which I do not think had adequately communicated how much I didn't mind; I had, after all, sent it - which Said An Awful Lot) hadn't meant it at all. (And if he had, I wouldn't have minded anyway.) He is someone I am Awfully Fond Of, and who has been Utterly Kind, Always, which is why I was curious.
Fourthly (this 'up' business is doing my head in), Mike - I must say, the way you describe being de-blog-rolled is utterly lovely. Anxious, does it soothe you? I am wondering if, when I go to Finland (for I shall, one day), I can get on the ferry of which you speak. (Oh and by the way I'd love to be put in touch with your friend in Amsterdam.)
UCL - what, you mean blogging is SERIOUS? (Yet again I fear I have failed to communicate Quite What I Meant!) - and yet I suspect you might be making A Little Joke there, which is probably good (if I could understand it).
Jonnyboy - why do birds/suddenly appear/every time/you are near? Now THAT'S poetry.
Z - I admire this very much. Tired Dad does the same, except I suspect that's because he is grumpy. I wish I had never started.
Apprentice - oh by the monkeys that be, yes. Arctic Rolled. My word!
MM - and that, after all, was the point: an excuse to introduce the disco Finns.
Ra Ra Rasputin ...
Well, I'm not entirely sure re: my blog being any good. It's new and a bit nervous, but who can resist a 'minorities being discriminated against' story? I know I can't. I hope to attract anarchists and influence politicians with my blogery.
What about you? What kind of employment are you currently seeking, if not happily on the dole?
Bloggery should have two g's. I'm not sure how that happened but I'm ashamed.
You are on my blogroll too. You have many admirers and probably do not need to know this. But just saying. I might be able to help with the publishing deal. I have friends in high places.
Heck, I thought you weren't a Grown Up until you *stopped* noticing that you weren't on someone's blogroll...
Cheerful darling, I do think you may be right. So far, you and Mike seem to have the best way of dealing with the issue, although I have an enormous amount of sympathy for dear Anx as well.
Reading The Signals - I know I am, you dear thing, you. And please contact your friends immediately, I have things to write for them. (Thank you, by the way. Is one of them John Random-House and the other Charles Faber-Faber?)
Morgan - don't ever be ashamed. There is a difference between leaving things out by mistake and being unable to spell, or distinguish the difference between "Die" and "De".
I always thought that I was Exceptionally Well Balanced :D
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