Following a sweaty, ill-prepared and hungover interview for a job I didn't want earlier this week, I receive some truly astonishing "feedback".
To my amazement, I am apparently "obviously very able" and "impressive", but "do not have enough recent FMCG experience" and am "too senior". (Maybe this is HR*-talk, and what they really mean is Too Old.)
Happily, therefore, I do not have to do this job I do not want to do. (I couldn't have worked with them anyway; they are obviously deaf and insane.) I will instead hope to do a non-permanent job I want to do, with people I already know well and like very much.
In the meantime, I've got at least another week of afternoon sleeps and Jeremy Kyle double bills on ITV2.
* Human Resources. Head of Talent. Head of People. Personnel. Real title should be "In charge of salaries and contracts, fire wardens and first aid and that, and get involved if someone you don't fancy touches your boot-ay").
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6 comments:
You have been discriminated against - surely as of last Sunday the classification "too senior" has been outlawed and therfore can no longer be a criterion for non-employment.
M'learned friends are awaiting...
Excellent! We Scots have this great catch-all saying, "What's for you will no go by you!"
Now slipping into X Factorese, "Follow your heart, and your dreams will surely follow!" (Or insolvency, but let's not go there today)
Total agree on HR, they are overpaid wankers.
FMCG=fast-moving consumer goods, dixit the wiki. Perhaps you didn't look swift enough to handle all these fast-moving goods; an obvious error on their part, as the quickness of the monkey should never be misunderestimated.
What were they selling anyway, wolverines ? Bits of quicksilver for kids to play with ? very fast-moving turnips ?
Ummmm...congratulations then?
At least you'll still have plenty of time for tin-opener shopping, meejah twat-insulting and arranging all those flowers and Ant and Bee books you'll be receiving shortly...
Dearest Apprentice, yes - and thank you for that - also known to me (and forgotten) as "What is for you will not pass you by", but I have now remembered it. Seriously, thank you.
P dear, I am too tired to fight with the Legal Monkeys but I like the thought of being a Test Case. (Perhaps under a microscope, in slices, which brings me on to ...)
Johnnyboy - Hoorah, you are back! They wouldn't tell me what they were selling, but I did mutter darkly: what, and newspapers don't move fast, or are bought by consumers? They mean chocolate, butter and that, all of which I am best kept away from.
Lee - yes, very well put.
Alias Lucy Diamond - fingers crossed ...
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