That is good. That means in one year I am going to be 40. Happily, my tiny little monkey hands are still tiny and smooth, and I am finding that the regular daily consumption of up to and including one litre of absinthe helps 'preserve the skin', as it were (although I dare not stop for fear my tiny little monkey face should fall!).
In other news, I do not recommend waxing your moustache at 1 in the morning after a few 'birthday sherberts', and I look forward to seeing what the veterinary research pathologist with whom I share a bed (and fleas) will be bringing back from the patisserie down the road.
While I wait for his return, I will read the excellent book on human biology that I begged for and have been given, and will enjoy reminding myself once again that my stomach is not where my belly button is, but is in fact higher up, far higher up; higher up than I could ever have dreamt possible.
Yours biologically
NWM
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20 comments:
you could perhaps read about why the belly button will continue to make headway towards the floor, and let us know.
Happy Birthday.
¡Cumpleaños Feliz! May your belly button continue to ride high. Self-mummification by the consumption of copious quantities of absinthe sounds a much better method than the Japanese Buddhist diet of pine tree.
Happy birthday.
Have you now a waxed moustache in the style of the most estimable Hercule Poirot? I am terribly impressed and envious if so, because I do not have a moustache that I can twirl.
Happy Birthday, from your resident lurker (not in an evil sense you understand, purely in a shy way :D)
Happy birthday and welcome to those difficult issues - to wax or not to wax? that is the question, if I bleach I look like Father Christmas but once waxed the little lines are laid bare.
Happy Birthday.
May your cup be always full.
asta
hope your birthday week is totally wonderful...what you don't get a week? why not, mssr vet better amp it up~!
Happy birthday, dearest monkey! May your glass always be half full and your clay pipe gently smoking.
Toot toot!
Hi Monkey
I just found your blog, very funny.
If I had a publishing company I would offer you a book deal. Unfortunately, I fit into the "non-working" category myself, as I (non) work for the government.
Happy birthday anyway!
happy Birthday NWM.
Belated birthday greetings, you cheeky monkey, you.
Hope you had a super day.
Belated birthday greetings, you cheeky monkey, you.
Hope you had a super day.
In honor I present one of the foul songs I was forced to sing as a small child, generally to another, usually scowling small child who had been dragged unwillingly to the front of the room where it was sung at and given a novelty pencil (which was at least once promptly stuck up the child's nose for the duration of the song. After that they waited until the singing was over thus depriving the child of their audience. Damn adults with no sense of high performance art):
Happy happy birthday Monkey dear,
Happy days will come to you all year!
If I had one wish THEN it would be
A happy, happy birthday to you from me.
Now I have to go find something to clean that damn song out of my brain. See? That's how much I care.
Happiest of happy birthdays! The beauty of 39 is that now you may stay there. No more having to remember how old you are this year. It is a glorious age, 39. At least it has been for the past 13 years for me.
What is the befleaed VPR bringing back from the patisserie that will repair your moustache? I await with bated breath for I have need of such a balm myself.
Also: I am not yet able to twirl my moustache but I do so live in hope.
Yours in haberdashery.*
*I know it doesn't, but I like it anyway.
Happy birthday, Monkey!
happy, HAPPY birthday, dear monkey!
the moustache bit i can understand!! not good. have you ever attempted to prise the wax off, and wept, while pressing a heated spoon against it, so that you don't actually do the bloody deal and remove any moustache?
not TOO much absinthe, i hope.
it makes the boobies sag.
I just remembered! 39 is nearly 38 isn't it?
Phew - not 40 next year, then, just 'nearly 39'
right now, best get back to dozing by the fire, away from the windy, squally evening here in bonny Scotland.
Ooh, happy birthday!
I am 39 too. It is good. Much better than 38 was. Or 37, for that matter.
@johnnyboy:
boards of canada: the campfire headphase
Thank you.
huh! you lot just wait until your next birthday is 62!
nearly forty sounds wonderful!
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