(Click on it. It'll get bigger, like a Magic Tree dipped in water.)
In Other Facebook News
Stop the status updates about your children. Now.
345 pictures of yourself?
No, I do not want to be turned into a vampire.
Dan Brown?
Yes, I will play Scrabulous with you, but I will probably cheat.
I'm trying to find a really polite way of saying "who the fuck are you?"
Did you ask permission before you tagged me?
If I log in to Facebook more than twenty times a day, am I a twat?
I like you, but ... isn't the BlackBerry thing a bit ...
Look. I can draw a giant cock on your graffiti wall!
No, we're not related.
In Further Facebook News
And Finally, Some Gnomes: Here, as reported by the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.
28 comments:
now i'm afraid to leave any more comments here.
i didn't ever ask permission....
Eh? Don't get it.
I hate when people tag me in pictures on Facebook without asking. It was especially bad when I first started university 'cause nobody was "of legal age" yet. Some people got nailed for underage drinking because of other people's stupidity using the tag feature.
Any time I think I might be missing out by not joining Facebook I am reassured that Facebook is not for me.
Thanks NWM for reminding me of that.
I am slightly surprised that you do not have a slice of pie for " People I went to school with and worked very hard to forget".
Non-Working Monkey does make exceedingly good pie charts.
re: tagging thing w/o permission
if you check your privacy settings and notification boxes, it will send you an email to let you know that someone tagged you and you have to ok it (or go to the picture and un-tag yourself)
also, isn't it common facebook etiquette to message someone first before sending a friend request? it would completely eliminate accidental friend requests and definitely not put you in that awkward position of having to befriend a stranger because you're too chicken to deny them.
lastly, while i like your pie chart, i am thinking that a venn diagram could be more appropriate. unless you don't consider your family also as friends/people you know/idiots/acquaintances, etc.
i've given this far too much thought, haven't i? your pie chart made me do it.
Sarah - it's just annoying, particularly if you look like a minger in the photograph in question. I am a fan of the self-edit, me, particularly looking as I do (like a run over monkey that's eaten too many bananas)
Asta - my pleasure dear.
Tim - thanks.
Kermit:
1. Yes I know about the tagging thing. I am trying to be amusing!
2. I don't know about Facebook etiquette. The idea that there is one at all makes me faint. But I was trying to be amusing there, also.
3. I completely agree with you on this and did in fact think of doing a Venn diagram, but the crossover would have been too complicated. For example, my brother is an idiot, I worked with him, he is my relative, and I wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire. What I have done instead is to take the dominant characteristic of each individual and divided it that way. Again, I was trying to be funny.
Conclusion: I am not funny, although I (genuinely) think there is nothing funnier than a comedy chart. In other words, the very idea of someone putting a lot of effort into something utterly futile is funny in itself. I did it once before, when you were a mere boy. It is here. I wasn't working then, either.
Also I am an idiot. Here is the URL for the thing I just tried to link. I can't make it work in the thingy with the html-hoo-ha*.
http://non-workingmonkey.blogspot.com/2006/09/day-72-i-am-quite-cross-about-not.html
* Technical expression
Well done - neither link works.
I like to think I could fit into any of several of your pie pieces. But, yes, the Venn diagram option would get all a bit spirography.
Also, I think lady monkeys should not be expected to piss on people who are on fire. It is unseemly. The only possible exception might be if the fire was accidentally started by mishandling of your small clay pipe.
Shelton man. The second one does. I just copied and pasted it and tried it. It's good.
There was a category called 'People I have not met but I think of as mates, e.g. Shelton and the Bookseller', but I had to drop it as it was getting illegible. But this also the absolute truth. So there.
I am particularly impressed at the "wall" feature. People can come and write on your wall and it is a nice thing.
Whereas you can always try to go and write on people's walls in reality.
slate magazine would have you believe there is such a thing as facebook etiquette. i'm assuming it's no different than regular etiquette.
and i did find the second part of the post funny (the first part was more true than funny, for me), as well as the one you linked to.
on a teeny technical note, i don't think i was a boy when you wrote that older post. unless i was kidnapped by aliens that erased my memory after performing a sex change operation on me.
Here is my favourite way to cheat at Scrabulous:
http://www.a2zwordfinder.com/scrabble_dictionary.html
I like being poked by strangers.
Apologies about the link thing. I am an idiot. There was, in this instance, a technical reason for my idiocy but it doesn't negate the basic fact of the matter.
I don't have a Facebook doodah. But I do have a folder full of Facebook friend requests or whatever you call them, which I am steadfastly ignoring.
I will resist the pull of Facebook, I will resist the pull of Facebook, I will resist the pull of Facebook...
I have a facebook addiction. I have 350 friends and I think I do know them all.
It is a fantastic tool for stalking the boy you met on the weekend who is too cool to call you. Muahahah.
Ok, I'm sad.
I have a very strict policy on Faceache of only having people I have actually met and monkeys as my friends.
I like the way the status thingy makes me write about myself in the third person, because it reminds me what a massive ego-wank the whole enterprise is.
Pete. Yes. Yes. Yes. For a long time, mine was "NWM is not liking writing about herself in the third person", or variations on that theme. Yes. Yah. See, it turns you into a pompous dick.
Well, me, anyway.
Miss M - I am impressed!! You must be very nice and/or foxy; maybe that. Or else a dealer in 'drugs'.
Clare - is ok, everyone will be bored of it soon, the way they are with blogs and mobile telephones.
Dave - you, artist and genius, need never explain. It is usually me at technical fault, e.g. trying to drive with the handbrake on, not plugging it in, batteries in upside down, needing help posting new title banner, etc etc. Need I say more.
Girl - you win, you win.
Marla - I am starting a group: "People who cheat at Scrabulous".
Kermit - oh bless you, dear thing, I always imagine you frowning.
Only 202? It always seems so many more.
Oh MonkeyMother! But YOU and MonkeyFather are my best friends, and from now on I shall call you by your first names in public, and hope that people mistake us for sisters! (It is better than being mistaken for MonkeyFather's WIFE, but would NOT be as bad as being mistaken for his SISTER, hem hem.)
It could have been 203...
I gotta policy. The peeps gotta know my name at least. Even the ones I don't know.
then can we be facebook enemies at least? or how about random strangers friends?
ever since my real life friends bamboozled me into joining facebook i have found it rather limiting by having only a friends list. i'd much prefer the option of an enemies list and a generally indifferent people list. i mean i'd learn a hell of a lot more about my friends if i knew who their enemies are.
Bluefluff. Just made connection. Yes. Tried to email you through your site(s) as delete most emails unless about for e.g. cat stuffing and/or details of waxing parlours, and do not have yours, but could not as no details. If that makes sense. Which it almost certainly doesn't.
You know there is a Facebook group and petition, with something like 500 million members, devoted to getting Facebook to drop that annoying "is" in the status! But I think it is becoming iconic, so they'll never drop it.
Am thrilled and honoured to be your hero, dear NWM, as well as your friend!
I too love the pie chart. It is a thing of beauty, and thus (of course) a joy forever.
Thanks - sorry to have been evasive!
Catching up now after Fun in Paris.
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