I cycled home in the rain via the shop (where I bought fish stock cubes by mistake), and thought how much better working is now that I am, in my heart, non-working. Life is much more pleasant when you stop caring where you'll be in five years' time and just do things you like doing.
But this mild cheerfulness was multiplied one-hundredfold when I returned home and discovered a communication from Farty, a regular commentator (but not, apparently, owner of blog). He has done some work on my true likeness, taken sometime last year by Mr Dave Shelton, and has made me into a Dutch Non-Working Monkey!
In truth, the Amsterdam people I have met mainly seem to spend time being tall, bicycling up and down, drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes. But no matter: I am charming in my clogs, and pleased with my plaits. Thank you, Mr Farty!
22 comments:
Look at the detail on those clogs!
"Life is much more pleasant when you stop caring where you'll be in five years' time and just do things you like doing" - Amen to that. It's what I'm aiming for...
Monkey, you are my hero. I am living in Amsterdam vicariously through you.
Charming hardly covers it.
Apparently, although I cannot remember who is supposed to have to said so - the Dutch are the tallest country in Europe. No rush but could you bear this in mind during your stay in the country of small beers. I mean they are all tall but drink very small beers.
My son had his mobile nicked in Amsterdam over the weeknd - you haven't seen it, have you?
Oh, *that* was what was wrong with me yesterday - I forgot to be Non Working!
Thank goodness you were here to remind me :)
i'm thinking mr. shelton owns a pair of clogs as marvellous as that so that he might paint them so beautifully.
and if you would like to read that in a dutch accent it would be sounding better.
p.s. I think you should become michael-palin-monkey, travelling the world and telling us all about it.
Did you think, if you didn't mention it, that I wouldn't notice the spliff (or whatever you young folk call those funny-smelling cigarettes now)?
And perhaps clever Mr Farty could replace the Hula Hoops with a large Edam cheese, or an almond cakey thing, or one of those syrup waffles? If only I had that much talent.
MM - I don't smoke, anything. Not even spliff. Not anything at all. And as far as I can see, the only people that DO sit in coffeeshops smoking the marijuana are pikey English tourists and long-haired Americans from Ohio. (What people do in the privacy of their own home I do not know.)
Do not change my Hula-Hoops. I need them.
Lucy - will Amsterdam and Canada do?
Dave - no. Is he still here? If so, I've got some spare Marmite for you.
Emma, Anx - pleased to be of assistance.
H - yes. Ironic really, bearing in mind how flat it is. I mean they don't have to look over hills and that.
Pants - I know. But what else can I say?
Morgan - how marvellous!
What's the small clay pipe for, then? Pot pourri?
I take your point about the Hula Hoops.
N.B. It was announced, on the BBC this very morning (so it must be true), that the Dutch are now officially the tallest nation in the World, overtaking the Americans, who are thought to have shrunk as a result of eating so much junk food.
There is a hill in Holland - we visited it once.
MM, I think the small clay pipe (or reefer) reflects a state of mind, like the Non-Workingness. It does not necessarily have any basis in physical reality.
Unlike the Hula Hoops.
NWM, Thanks for posting the likeness. Fame at last!
btw, the Cable People are coming this very afternoon to connect my brand new PC to t'internet, so I can stop stealing, er, borrowing, electrons from my employer. I will then give some Serious Thought to starting my own blog. Ooer.
Cheers m'dears!
Ooh Mr Farty - philosophically as well as technically brilliant - you have clarified everything.
I might have to go and lie down now, while considering the energy it would take to start one's own blog. Congratulations for giving it fleeting, let alone serious, thought. I just don't think I could be arsed. And anyway, one blogger in the family is probably quite enough.
Beautiful work Farty! A wee mouse on some stairs wouldn't go amiss!
I love the clogs.
no amsterdam and canada will not suffice.
i want mongolia, afghanistan, siberia, the andes, and of course Portugal. thank you.
Dang. Not only is my university NOT recognized as such by the Very Impressive Stat Machine, for some reason I can't even see the new improved Dutch version of the NWM! Instead I get a very small box hot-link that leads to a helpful page stating: [Dutch_Monkey.JPG].
Nemmind, I'm using my imagination, and as I know the picture contains (1) pipe (some) hula hoops (some) plaits and at least (1) monkey I have no doubt the blonde rastafarian circus orangutan in my mind is utterly accurate.
don't say pikey. It's rude, offensive and ignorant.
I'll take the last one first:
Of course. Since you ask. I will of course listen to you and take your opinion on board. What do you think of the following?
- cunt
- cretin
- fuckwit
- virtually retarded feline
- insane
I like those ones too!
Be good if you could also clarify the following:
"Offensive" to whom? Pikeys?
"Rude" ? How? Who? What?
"Ignorant" of what?
ARE YOU DAVID ESSEX?
Hi NWM, I'd like to send you a photo of a really strange looking monkey decorating a beach in India, but your link isn't working for me, I don't use Internet Explorer and don't have an email service set up for that. How big do you like your pics. Or you can just go look at it on:
http://indibliss.blogspot.com/
Love your blog, read it whenever my connection is up.
anonymous is probably jade goody.
clickety me to see the mouthy pikey !
Snow Crab - do please try again, the link should be Effective!
Vitriolica - do you think J could spell "ignorant"?
J-Boy - sweet Monkeys on a stick.
a red x!?!?!?!?
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