I can speak French. French like a French twelve year old can speak French. Not much of an accent, but enough to know that I Am Not French, if you are French.
In Montreal they speak French. And also English. But mainly French. Signs are in French (and English), but mainly in French. The French they speak is definitely French, but I don't understand much of it. Yesterday I had a conversation that went like this (in French):
Me: Could I have a carnet of tickets please?
Man: Unintelligible, eleven dollars, unintelligible, carnet, unintelligible, very unintelligible thank you
Me: I'm very sorry, could you speak a little more slowly, my French isn't very good.
Man: But you ARE French.
Me: No I'm not.
Man: Yes you are!
Me: No I'm not, I'm English.
Man: But you speak French with a French accent!
Me: Well yes, but not very well.
Man: But your French is very, very good!
Me: Not really. I am having a lot of trouble understanding the accent here. I am truly Desolated.
Man (shaking head, passing Metro tickets under the glass): Your accent is of la France profonde. This is bizarre.
Me (slightly deflated): I know. Sorry. Where do I put my ticket?
Man:Unintelligible, hole, unintelligible, unintelligible, very unintelligible, NO, THERE, CAN'T YOU SEE?
Me: I'm sorry, I don't really understand.
Man (exasperated): BUT YOU CAN SPEAK FRENCH!
Repeat to fade.
I am listening to the radio a lot.
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14 comments:
Don't be despondent - the québécois accent is very different if you've been brought up on Euro-French. It sounds to me like French with a North American accent. And lots of archaic words and expressions thrown in to confuse you even more.
You are a victim of your own success.
Yup smartypants, you'll have to resort to shouting and asking for a full English shortly, just like the rest of us ;)
My French would sound like a the French equivalent of a British Pathe newsreel of about 1958, cos that was probably when my French teacher left uni.
Word verification says "mof po" to French.
Note to self: Do NOT drink coffee (real or instant) whilst reading Monkey blog. This is definitely NSFW. Haven't laughed so much in ages.
Can't wait to hear about the penguins.
btw saw Butterscotch on the Paul O'Grady Show today. She is CUTE!
I knew it, I blinking bloody well knew it! I too can speak enough French to get by (providing getting by means ordering a round of beers and asking for the toilet, not debating the profundity of Life. And when in Reims, I also like to use an accent. Puts me a cut above the 'Oi, Garsons'!
So... one day, I'm watching a French Canadian documentary about the clinically obese going under the knife. One man spoke French in a kind of, well, deeply unsettling way.
'Surely', I thought, 'French speaking Canadians don't speak French the way Americans throttle and abuse English?'
And then I read this. Clearly they do.
Bonne chance.
As it goes it is probably like all languages and accents, sometimes really lovely (2 ladies in shop), sometimes like fingernails down a blackboard (man in flower shop today). All I know is I find quebecois french easier to understand that anyone from Birmingham, Newcastle, most of Wales, a lot of Gloucestershire and more of Glasgow than I would like in that "I'm terribly sorry my good man, what did you say?" way.
Sigh.
I learned all my French from Asterix, and all my German from Commando Picture Library. I can start a war in either language.
My best friend has the same problem only the other way: she is French Canadian. Once she took French classesd (in London) to bring her French up, as it were; when the teacher would ask a question, she would answer it, and he'd announce to the class: "Okay everyone, she is right, but DON'T EVER DO IT LIKE THAT."
I'm glad you're having fun! (I know you are. I saw the picture of the squirrel.)
hahahahahaha..He called you French.
sorry.
Being called French in Quebec is not a compliment. Nevermind. I can still remember the first time I was addressed in east-end Joual. My brain hurt for days.
Go get a coffee and get ready for the snow.
The Quebecois, they are not always the most patient. They vacation in Maine, where I live, and often seem easily frustrated. However, I am sure of your ability to charm the pants off them, assuming that you desire them to be pantsless.
Mikey - the language of war is obviously German. Speak in French and all you'll start an exchange of minor sexual put-downs.
Sorry. Commenting on another's blog. That's probably not polite.
Farty, thou speakest the truth. [sigh]
If only I'd read your comment before settling down with a cup of coffee in front of the laptop. Said machine is now in need of urgent de-coffee-ination.
No, you all carry on. Your comments more amusing than posts, yet again. LOVED your story, Miss B. I feel like a lion without his mane without the Words that can come out of my mouth. It is strange but oddly soothing.
What I love about Québécois French is the fact that you're really hearing it in a purer form, a more archaic form that what you will hear in France today. It's a wonderful example of what happens when a group fractures (geographically) from the larger linguistic whole -- it doesn't necessary evolve in the same way, or even as much, as that spoken by the majority that remains where it started. So what you here in Quebec today is much more like (although, not exactly like) what you would have heard in France a few hundred years ago.
Merde. That sounded a little pedantic, didn't it. Désolée.
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