What with conversations with the people I know being what they are, I was reminded (yet again) of "pickled beet" earlier today. Assuming that "beet" (when spoken of in the Colonies) is the same as our "beetroot", I then set to thinking about things preserved in vinegar and decided that they were, on the whole, a particularly bad thing. A roast beetroot is a nice thing. A beetroot in a soup is a nice thing. The colour of beetroot is pleasant, if unbelievable. An onion is vital, some would say, and life would be immeasurably sadder without an egg or two. But put all these things in vinegar and they become strange. Then again, I can sort of see why someone would put an onion or a beetroot* in vinegar; but eggs? Why would a person do this thing?
Look at this! Publicans can get 2.25kg jars of pickled eggs to put on their bars, selling individual eggs to happy punters at 20p a pop. (There's even a strong possibility that people buy whole jars for themselves and put them in the larder to have As A Treat after a long day at work.) This means only one thing: that someone somewhere is boiling eggs and preserving them in vinegar. Mr Driver (the creator of the pickled eggs you see in this charming photograph), pays his mortgage and the salaries of his egg-pickling employees with money made from pickling eggs. But no egg-pickling would occur if it wasn't for the fact that PEOPLE ALL OVER THE COUNTRY ARE EATING PICKLED EGGS. (This is something to do with the Economics - suppy and demand, market forces, that kind of thing.)
Who are they? Where are they? Why are they doing this strange thing? Eat Scampi Fries instead, my strange pickled egg-eating friends. They too are illogical, but somehow more logical than a pickled egg.
* Pickled beetroot exists to stain clean shirts and tablecloths, and make all the other food on your plate a shade of purple that Food Should Not Be. Pickled onions exist to make your breath smell like Satan's sputum once you have drunk 12 pints and realised you are not going to pull.
14 comments:
My diet consists mainly of pickled foods. Beets. Pickles. Peppers. Cabbage.
But pickled eggs are not on my approved pickled foods list. Mostly because I am afraid of eggs. Eggs = Chicken mestrual cycles. I can't work with that.
I don't like vinegar. One of my Mother-in-Laws used to pickle eggs. We used to sell them over the bar. People would buy a packet of salt 'n 'vinegar crisps and make a meal out of them by putting the wet pickled egg into the packet of crisps - shake them all about and then eat them with their Guinness.
Disgusting. But we did make money from them.
I find the notion of pickled eggs repugnant, but I would defend to the death the right of some ghastly provincial oik to gorge himself on them and then use the jar to store greasy brown coins.
Up here in the Frozen Wastes, to preserve our harvest and keep us going through the winter, we pickle everything. Or make it into jam.
Egg jam is not good.
Pickled eggs are just wrong.
Have you ever eaten one? Without doubt one of the nastiest things I've ever consumed. Being Scottish and raised on Scottish "cuisine" this should give you an idea of how filthy they are.
I thought I was cool with the whole pickling concept until I visited a Russian Supermarket. They have whole aisles dedicated to pickled "things". Shelf after shelf of jars in various sizes containing a variety of stuff I've never seen before, pickled or otherwise. Truly a sight to behold but rather scary at the same time.
I'm with you, here.
Pickling is generally wrong. I can't think of a single pickled thing that I like. I spurn their vinegariness.
The only vinegar I have is in salad dressings.
I can just about eat salt and vinegar crisps, but it involves quite a lot of wincing.
Pickling innocent foodstuffs is just plain wrong, allthough I think it pumps them full of Vitamin C, so no rickets in Poland then.
Only things worth doing with vinegar: take the limescale off your taps; mop up pets' pee; avoid putting too much in your salad dressing.
i tried one once. it was like eating sour rubber on the outside bit and the middle bit was unspeakable. but not quite as bad as hundred year old eggs... they look truly nasty. ever seen one? clear BLACK eggwhite and blue yolk. disgusting... and i think they probably taste like sick.
but, i DO like salt and vinegar crisps. and chutney would be nothing without vinegar, (and i don't mean that branston muck) or piccalilly or esparregado (my way at least)... hang on... I LOVE vinegar.
Mist - As ever, you Amaze Me.
Eyebrows - this is Quite Extraordinary! People are Terribly Strange and I have given up trying to Understand What They Are Doing.
Porny Boy - have you actually tried it though, egg jam?
Davenelli - did they have pickled cock?
Anxious - yes I agree as it goes. Not even sure about Salt 'n' Vinegar crisps although Chipsticks are just about OK if you're drunk.
MM - well I've never seen a Pole with rickets, so you must be right.
Lucy - I do not want to think about black and blue eggs. My hands feel slightly nauseous. This Is Not A Joke.
Oh monkey if you only knew - eggs and beets are not even the half of it.
3 words:
1. Pickled
2. Pork
3. Lips.
Holy shit.
Pickles, as they say, are just cucumbers steeped in Evil, and the same is true for all forms of pickled things.
But what are these scampi fries of which you speak?
Scampi fries are but a poor substitute for pork sctatchings.
As one whose ancestors left England for the New World (with a short stop in Holland) back in the early 1700s, I was raised in an environment where nothing was pickled except cucumbers, the occasional beet(root), and there was that one ex-boyfriend whose crazy granny pickled watermelon rinds... In fact, when Americans say "pickles", they mean pickled cucumbers, and we have dozens of kinds with different names depending on size, cut, and brining solution.
But anyway, imagine my dismay at being unintentionally knocked-up in Surrey in 1993 and able to find everything pickled except cukes in Tesco! (Don't talk to me about the Sainsbury -- it was a very small one, and I'd rathered drive to the Tesco than walk to it.)
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