I give you some free beats for Friday, and sit back and wait for you to grin from ear-to-ear

I offer up some super links

First of all, you may like to see how the genitals make use of the gap.

For ladies of "C-cup or larger", you may want to order your Kush.

Third of all, I know for a fact that you will, each and every one of you, very much enjoy grabbing your nuts and following me.

But first, back to wedding planning, where today's difficult choice is: which place card holders? Adirondack chairs, or barbecue equipment?































If all else fails, perhaps I can ask Angela Fiebelkorn for help. On the other hand, she's pissed on my "get each guest to give me $200 on their way out" bonfire, so maybe I shouldn't listen to a word she says.

I have an excellent new web-blog that you will like

It is fucking ace. It is a repository of stupid names you find when drunkenly looking at strangers' photographs on Facebook. You will love it, and you must send some in if you have some. (NB: screen grabs only, otherwise I will not know they are definitely off Facebook.)

I am planning

Yes, dear readers, I am not dead; I am more than alive, and responding to the wordless beseeching I hear falling out of your every pore, begging me to update my web-blog with hot news and tips from my kaleidoscopically fascinating daily living-existence.

Today, I am distracted by heavy rain and my lettuce seedlings - but tomorrow a whole new day beckons, full of more rain, lettuce seedlings, and an update on how plans for my wedding are forming under my ever-watchful gaze.

In the meantime, I give you a sneak preview of my wedding cake:

I see it's been watched over 20,000 times

... and 19,965 of them have been me, trying to do a drawing of Kiki's dungarees.